Yabancı Seks Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce Seks Fıkraları, World's Funniest Sex Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik Seks Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2008

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XXX -- FIKRA -- 07

 

 

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WHAT A PARTY !!

A couple was invited to a masked Halloween Party. She got a terrible headache and told her husband to go to the party alone. So he took his costume and away he went. The wife, after sleeping for an hour, awakened feeling much better so she decided to go to the party.

Halloween = Cadılar Bayramı... Away he went. = Anlatıma hareket katan bir sözdizim tarzı...

Since her husband didn't know what her costume was, she thought she would have some fun by watching him to see how he acted when she was not with him. So she got to the party and spotted her husband cavorting around on the dance floor, dancing with every nice chick he could.

cavort /kı-VO:RT/ = (USA)  sıçramak, dansetmek... chick /ÇİK/ = "piliç"...

His wife sidled up to him and being a rather seductive babe herself, he left his partner and devoted his time to the new stuff that had just arrived. She let him go as far as he wished; naturally, since he was her husband.

sidle up to smb /SAY-dıl/ = birine sokulmak... seductive /si-DAK-tiv/ = baştan çıkarıcı... herself = kendisi de... to devote = hasretmek, tümüyle ona ayırmak/vermek... stuff = "malzeme"...

Finally he whispered a little proposition in her ear and she agreed, so off they went to one of the cars and had a little bang.

proposition = teklif, öneri... off they went = fırlayıp gittiler... bang /BÆNG/ = (argo) cinsel ilişki...

Just before unmasking at midnight, she slipped away and went home and put the costume away and got into bed, wondering what kind of explanation he would make for his behavior.

to unmask = 1. maskesini çıkarmak; (2. başka yerde, bir kimsenin"maskesini düşürmek" anlamına da kullanılabilir)... slipped away = "kayıp uzaklaştı/gitti", "çaktırmadan" ortalıktan kayboldu...

She was sitting up reading when he came home and asked what kind of a time he had. He said, "Oh, the same old thing. You know I never have a good time when you're not there."

Then she asked, "Did you dance much?"

He replied, "I'll tell you, I never even danced one dance. When I got there, I met Pete, Don and Bill and some other guys, so we went into the den and played poker all evening. But I'll tell you... the guy I loaned my costume to, sure had a real good time!"

 

xxx fıkra

 

STILL A VIRGIN !!

A newly-wed couple arrives at a hotel on their honeymoon and when they go up to their room the wife tells the husband, "Please be gentle with me, because I'm still a virgin."

The husband, looking perplexed, replies, "But honey, you've told me that you've been married three times before."

looking perplexed = şaşırmış, hayrete düşmüş görünüyordu...

The wife responds:

"Well, my first husband was a psychiatrist and he just wanted to talk about it all the time.

"My second husband was a gynecologist and he just wanted to examine it all the time.

to examine = 1. muayene etmek (doktor)... 2. incelemek, gözden geçirmek; 3. sınava tabi tutmak...

"And, my third husband was a stamp collector and he just wanted -- "

She pauses for a moment and then adds with a sigh,

"Oh, I do miss him!"

I do miss him. = I miss him very much (pekiştirilmiş anlatım tarzı)...

 

xxx fıkra

 

DIFFERENT SIZES OF BALLS !!

When workers get together they often talk about football.

When middle management meet, they talk about tennis.

When top management meet they talk about golf.

Conclusion: The higher you climb in the corporate ladder the smaller your balls become.

İşçiler futbol, idari kadro tenis, yöneticiler de bir araya gelince golf konuşurlar...

Sonuç: Şirket hiyerarşisinde nekadar yükseğe tırmanırsanız, "toplarınız" o derecede küçülür...

 

xxx fıkra

Yabancı XXX Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce XXX Fıkralar, World's Funniest XXX Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik XXX Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2008

xxx fıkra

 

FOR ENLARGEMENT !!

On their first night together, the bride comes out of the bathroom, having taken a shower and wearing a beautiful robe.

having taken a shower = duş almış olarak... duş aldıktan sonra...

The proud husband says, "My dear, we are married now, you can take off your robe."

The beautiful young woman takes off her robe, and he is astonished."Oh, oh, aaaahhh," he exclaims, "My God you are so beautiful, I must take a picture of you at once.

Puzzled she asks, "My picture?"

He answers, "Yes my dear, so I can carry your beauty next to my heart forever".

He takes her picture, and then he heads into the bathroom to shower and change.

heads into the bathroom = banyoya doğru gider, girer...

He comes out wearing his robe and the new wife asks, "Why do you wear a robe? We are married now."

So, the man opens his robe and she exclaims, "Oh my God, Oh my God! Let me take a picture at once".

He beams and asks why and...

beams = yüzü bir gülümsemeyle aydınlanır, beşlik simit gibi sırıtır...

She answers, "So I can get it enlarged!"

Resmini çekeyim ki, büyüttürebilirim diye...

 

xxx fıkra

 

COBBLES WORK WANDERS !

Parke Taşları Mucizeler Yaratıyor !

Two nuns are cycling down a cobbled street.

The first one says "I've never come this way before".

The second one replies "Must be the cobbles!"

to work wanders = harikalar/mucizeler yaratmak... nun /NAN/ = rahibe... cobbled road = parke döşeli yol... cobbles = parke taşları... I've never come this way. = 1) Bu yoldan hiç geçmemiştim; 2) Hiç böylesi bir orgazm yaşamamıştım...

  WOW !!

 

xxx fıkra

 

WHAT'S FOR DINNER !!

It was Christmas Eve and a woman came home to her husband after a day of busy shopping.

Later on that night when she was getting undressed for bed he noticed a mark on the inside of her leg.

Christmas Eve = Noel Arifesi... mark = iz, işaret...

He asked her what it was she told him that she had visited the tattoo parlor that day and on the inside of one leg she had "Merry Christmas" tatooed, and on the inside of the other one she had "Happy New Year."

tattoo /ta-TU:/ = dövme (vücuda yapılan süsleme)... parlor = salon, işyeri...

Her husband asked her what all that meant and her reply was, Well, now you can't complain that there's never anything to eat between Christmas and New Year's Day!"

asked her what all that meant = bütün bunların ne anlama geldiğini sordu...

 

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ingilizce seti süper

fikralar     .SÜPER İNGİLİZCE EĞİTİM SETİ.   fikralari

fikralar     KPDS HAZIRLIK SETİ -- EN İYİSİ.   fikralari

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WHOSE ZIP WAS IT ?

Kimin Fermuarıydı ki ?

In a crowded city at a busy bus stop, a beautiful young woman wearing a tight mini skirt was waiting for a bus.

zip = fermuar... tight /TAYT/ = sımsıkı saran...

When at long last a bus stopped and it was her turn to get on, she became aware that her skirt was too tight to allow her leg to come up to the height of the first step of the bus.

at long last = sonunda, nihayet... when... it was her turn to get on = binme sırası ona gelince... became aware = farkına vardı... skirt /SKÖ:T/ = etek, eteklik... tight = sıkı (burada) dar... too tight to allow... etc = bacağını otobüsün ilk basamağına kadar kaldırmasına izin vermeyecek ölçüde dardı...

Slightly embarrassed and with a quick smile to the bus driver, she reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little, thinking that this would give her enough slack to raise her leg. She tried to take the step, only to discover that she couldn't.

slightly embarrassed = biraz utanmış, mahçup duruma düşmüş olarak... quick smile = Bunun anlamını, sahneyi gözünüzde canlandırarak, metnin gelişinden çıkarmanız gerekiyor; örneğin "kısa ve utangaç bir gülümsemeyle"... reached her back to unzip her skirt a little = fermuarını biraz açmak için elini arkasına götürdü... slack = gevşeklik, (burada) pay...

So, a little more embarrassed, she once again reached behind her to unzip her skirt a little more, and for the second time attempted the step.

Once again, much to her chagrin, she could not raise her leg. With a little smile to the driver, she again reached behind to unzip a little more and again was unable to take the step.

chagrin /şı-GRİN/ = üzüntü, iç sıkıntısı, hayal kırıklığı... much to her chagrin = büyük bir hayal kırıklığı ile (gördü ki, keşfetti ki)...

About this time, a large Texan who was standing behind her picked her up easily by the waist and placed her gently on the step of the bus. She was furious and turned to the man and yelled, "How dare you touch my body! I don't even know who you are!"

was furious= çok öfkelenmişti...

The Texan smiled and drawled, "Well, ma'am, normally I would agree with you, but after you unzipped my fly three times, I kinda figured we was friends."

to drawl = ünlüleri yaya yaya konuşmak... fly = pantolon önü fermuarı... I kinda (kind of) figured... etc = Herhalde arkadaşız diye düşündüm...

 

xxx fıkra

 

HOW TO DEFLATE A DOLL

Two elderly gentlemen, who had been without sex for several years, decided they needed to visit a whorehouse.

whorehouse = brothel = genelev...

When they arrived at the whorehouse, the madame took one look at them and decided she wasn't going to waste any of her girls on these two old men. So she used "blow-up" dolls instead. She put the dolls in each man's room and left them to their business.

blow-up = şişirme, şişme...

After the two men were finished, they started for home and got to talking.

The first man said, "I think the girl I had was dead. She never moved, talked or groaned... How was it for you?"

to groan = inlemek...

The second man replied, "I think mine was a witch."

witch /WİÇ/ = cadı...

The first man asked, "How's that?"

"Well," said the second man, "when I nibbled on her breast, she passed gas and flew out the window!"

nibble = ufak ısırıklarla didikleyerek yemek... to pass gas = gaz kaçırmak... flew out of the window = pencereden uçup gitti...

 

xxx fıkra

 

SEX AND SENILITY

A ninety-year-old man is sitting on a park bench, sobbing, when a young man walks by and asks him what's wrong.

senile /-nayl/ = bunak, bunamış (sıfat)... senility /sı--liti/ = bunaklık, bunamışlık... park bench = bank... to sob = hıçkırmak, içini çeke çeke ağlamak...

Through his tears the old man answers, "I'm in love with a twenty-five-year-old woman."

through his tears = gözyaşlarının arasından...

"What's wrong with that?" asks the young man.

Between his sobs and sniffles, he answers, "You don't understand. Every morning before she goes to work, we make love... At lunchtime she comes home and we make love again, and then she makes my favourite meal.

sniffles = burun çekmeler... You don't understand. = Anlamıyorsun ki... my favourite meal = en sevdiğim yemek...

In the afternoon when she gets a break, she rushes home and gives me oral sex, the best an old man could want. And then at suppertime, and all night long, we make love."

He breaks down, no longer able to speak.

to get a break = iş arası verilmek... rushes home = koşarak eve gelir... to break down = asabı bozulup hıçkırmağa başlamaktan ağır depresyona kadar hertürlü kişilik çöküşünü kapsayabilen bir deyimdir...

The young man puts his arm around him. "I don't really understand. It sounds like the two of you have got a perfect relationship. Why are you crying?"

The senile old man answers, again through his tears, "I forgot where I live."

it sounds like = Öyle görülüyor ki, öyle anlaşılıyor ki... Bu deyime dikkat ediniz. İngilizce'de gözle görülen durumlar için "it looks like"; kulakla işitilenler için ise "it sounds like" tercih ediliyor. Türkçe'de böyle bir ayrım gözetmiyoruz.... the two of you = siz ikiniz...

 

seks fıkraları 06     yabancı fıkralar     seks fıkraları 08

 

 

 
 

Yabancı XXX Fıkra: Türkçe Açıklamalı İngilizce XXX Fıkralar, World's Funniest XXX Jokes, Kesinlikle Dünyanın En Komik XXX Fıkraları,

Doç. Dr. Yalçın İzbul, "Practical English For Turks"

   Copyrighted 2001-2008

TIKLAYINIZ... Ayrı Pencere Açılacaktır

 WEBSİTE     TESTLER     KARİKATÜR     EĞLENCE

 

ingilizce seti süper

fikralar     .SÜPER İNGİLİZCE EĞİTİM SETİ.   fikralari

fikralar     KPDS HAZIRLIK SETİ -- EN İYİSİ.   fikralari

süper fıkralar

TIKLAYINIZ... Ayrı Pencere Açılacaktır